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Since 1951, the hallowed corridors of IIT Kharagpur (IIT-K) and its sister institutes across India, have produced a crop of the best brains in the country — with intelligence that can rival the Jobs and Gates of the world and armed with pay packages that can give our Jatt boyz a run for their dowry. But behind the success stories of these nerds, geeks and techies, have lingered dark secrets — of long days wasted caressing machines, of lonely nights spent recalling how a real-woman-without-myopia looked like, and of hours exhausted devising mathematical formulae on ‘how to make eye-contact with the cute girl who visits the grocery store?’
If popular stories emanating from some of the best educational institutes in India like the IITs, IIMs and NITs are anything to go by, it won’t be too hard to believe that the skewed boy-to-girl ratio in these institutions has led to many a Devdas-in-the-making. “Even with your high profile IIT degree and your sky-high value in the marriage market, you are still stuck with one of the few girls from IIT, who in no way can be a 10-pointer on looks. That is seriously unfair,” Deepjyoti Deka, a B-tech from IIT Guwahati, sighs.
But now, three IIT-K graduates have taken upon themselves the task of alleviating the dire straits of their forlorn mates. In January this year, 22-year-olds Layak Singh, Kinshuk Bairagi and Nikhil Kaushik launched a social dating website called DateIITians that encourages IITians (primarily, and also those from IIMs, NITs, med schools and other geek-producing institutes) to explore ‘meaningful relationship’ opportunities among, well, lesser mortals.
The website was conceived three years ago, when the trio, still in the second year of their engineering, opted for an internship with an education consultancy company in Kolkata. “While mentoring IIT and IIM aspirants on how to crack the entrances, we came across many interesting (and interested) girls who we otherwise had no chance of meeting,” says Singh. A vision dawned on them — of a world where geeks and nerds can mingle freely, without hesitation and sans prescribed scientific dos and don’ts, with people from the opposite sex. Thus was born DateIITians.
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Three 22-year olds have launched a dating website called DateIITians that encourages IITians (primarily, and also med schools and other geek-producing institutes) to explore ‘meaningful relationship’ opportunities among, well, lesser mortals.
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After a registration process, followed by a three-step verification to limit fake profiles, a member can get access to network among peers, flirt with interested candidates, develop a crush and make a proposal. “Requests have to be sent on each step. A buddy request can be followed by a flirt request which can be a personal message or a gift,” Singh says. Gifts can be bought on the site itself through e-commerce and when flirting takes you to the stage where your heart starts fluttering, you can then send a crush request and take it further with a proposal. Singh says, “We are very strict about the content and hence filter all slangs and lewd comments by tracking messages with key-words.”
The website is currently in its alpha stage and new features are being planned for updates, including a 3D chat. “For a guy in a place like Kharagpur, to take a beautiful girl out on a date would mean travelling three hours to Kolkata,” Singh laughs. “So with 3D chat, people will have the option to go on virtual dates.” This means your online avatar can take your partner’s avatar to a cafe, watch a movie or play a game and if, science allows, part with a goodnight kiss.
DateIITians has drawn over 7,000 members in just over four months and has seen 1,100 flirt requests. But not every geek is excited about it. Bhargav, an MBA from XLRI says bitterly, “Sites like this won’t help. Women only like to live off us. Since, most of us are not well versed with the game of love, women leave us after they are done decorating themselves with our pay-cheques.” Deka has a simpler solution for it all, “Who needs a dating site? Take the help of your shining resume and the rich uncle in Bhatinda to find a girl along with some crores.”
This article was originally posted on http://www.sunday-guardian.com by SATARUPA PAUL 20th May
Should I get that cool, sexy tattoo on my body? How many times have we mulled over this single question but are stopped midway with thoughts like, “our parents would get a mild heart attack” or “it would pain a lot”. Tattoos are the “in” thing these days and are thought of as being cool and trendy. People have their own reasons for getting a tattoo, some do it to express their individuality, some do it for paying tribute to people while some get them for the sake of a wonderful memory which they want to keep close to their heart. Tattoo is a very personal decision, it would literally stay with you “forever” so “think well before you ink”. The first things that you need to know are the risks involved in getting a permanent tattoo.
The Risks
- Infection – Dirty needles can pass infections, like hepatitis and HIV, from one person to another.
- Allergies – Allergies to various ink pigments in both permanent and temporary tattoos have been reported and can cause problems.
- Scarring – Unwanted scar tissue may form when getting or removing a tattoo.
- Granulomas – These small knots or bumps may form around material that the body perceives as foreign, such as particles of tattoo pigment.
- MRI complications – People may have swelling or burning in the tattoo when they have magnetic resonance imaging (MRI). This happens rarely and does not last long.
Next, you need to find a good place about which you are sure about so that the above risks are minimized.
The most important decision is the quest for the perfect tattoo. Don’t just go for random designs that might look good, go for something that is meaningful and has a connection with you. Express something from your tattoo like a “live and let live” type of quote can be used to express your motto of life; a sketch of a Scorpio can be used to represent your zodiac sign etc.
There is a growing demand of tattoo quotes these days. They are better because they are more expressive and people can create their own quote. Choose a phrase which makes a statement not something as senseless as,” word sound power” You can even consider using a foreign language or foreign letters for your tattoo, this can make it even more interesting. Some Latin phrases are here for your help.
| Latin phrase | English meaning |
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I am not led, I lead |
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bold but faithful |
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I struggle and emerge |
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Know thyself |
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I came, I saw, I conquered |
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Words fly away, writings remain |
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Truth is my light |
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He conquers who conquers himself. |
If you are aware about the risks involved, the pain you would have to endure, the pocket money you would have to loose and your parent’s wrath and you still want that tattoo then you should go for it. Just take your decision wisely.
Many a times we have read articles suggesting us as to whether we should watch a particular movie or not but rarely we come across articles that guide us as to how to watch a movie. This is one of the latter kind.Movie- watching has become one of the most loved pastime for young and old alike. It is an experience we all like to take pleasure in but there are people who are capable of totally annoying you and robbing you of the fun and joy you would have felt and rather makes you a sulking and irritated viewer. If you don’t want to be that someone, then keep in mind that there are certain rules for watching movies.
Switch off that ever-ringing phone: Yes we are aware that you are a very important person and a celebrity amongst your friends, each one of them turns to you for advice and your mobile never stops ringing and you are totally proud of the fact. But seriously nobody at the movie hall is here to know what a flourishing social life you have, so kindly keep your cell phone switched off or in silent mode.
Hush up or go out and talk : Even if you take up a call which is very important, kindly keep it as soft and short as possible. If you can’t do that there’s always the exit gate, go out and finish the conversation.
Keep your comments to yourself: You are here to enjoy the movie and so is everyone else. Its fun to come in a big group with friends but stop passing those snide comments which you and your friends think are very funny and are howling with laughter. Always keep in mind there are other people as well, so just hush up a little.
Get a room guys: If you turn to movies to spend some “alone time” with your partner by getting all romantic and mushy mushy, please get a room guys. This is so not the place for stuff like this, maintain the decency of the place, you might be comfortable with public display of affection but others are not.
Don’t bring the crying babies: Avoid bringing your little baby to movies and if you do, take the kid out when he cries so as not to disturb others.
Stop kicking the front seats: Many people have a habit to just swing their legs and keep kicking the front seat, you might not even be aware about it but you’re totally pissing off the person sitting on the chair.
No smoking, drinking or littering: Most theatres nowadays don’t allow taking any eatables inside, which solves the problem of smoking or drinking but it won’t hurt you if you avoid making a bloody mess throwing packets here and there, spreading popcorn everywhere and sticking chewing gums under your seats.
Control your bodily functions: Stop farting or burping, if you really have to do it, please go use the washroom.
let’s make sure we follow these simple rules and turn the movie watching experience into a pleasure for all.
Sexual orientation concerns the direction of one’s sexual or romantic attraction. The most commonly found sexual orientation in all cultures, including the United Kingdom, is heterosexuality, a sexual or romantic attraction for persons of the opposite sex (hetero comes from the Greek word meaning ‘other’ or ‘different’). Today the term gay is used to refer to male homosexuals, lesbian for female homosexuals, and bi as shorthand for bisexuals, people who experience sexual or romantic attraction for persons of either sex. Sexual orientation is the idea that people are sexually attracted to either men or women or both women and men. This leads to the categories of heterosexual, homosexual and bisexual. Some people identify with this idea very strongly. They may believe that their sexual desires are natural, that evolution or genetics causes them to be attracted to certain people. Others may believe that they choose a sexual orientation, often for political reasons. Still others may not be concerned with the cause of their desires, but identify strongly as straight, lesbian, gay or bisexual. Some people identify with this idea less strongly or perhaps not at all. They may feel that the three categories of sexual orientation do not do a good job of describing their sexual desires. They may choose other labels, like queer (Homosexual or arousing homosexual desires), dyke (a lesbian who is noticeably masculine) or pervert (A person whose behavior deviates from what is acceptable especially in sexual behavior).Or they may choose to avoid the use of labels for various reasons.
Understanding sexual orientation is an important part of understanding the society we live in. Attitudes about what it means to be a man or a woman are often based around expectations of heterosexuality. Fear that children might learn to become homosexual, or otherwise sexually ‘deviant’, leads to a great deal of anxiety around sex education. Violence, both physical and emotional, is used against people who do not conform to expectations around gender and sexuality.
Here are a few examples of various sexual orientation identities:
- simply gay OR lesbian OR heterosexual OR straight OR bisexual OR queer
- “I don’t like labels”
- “Mostly straight”
- “I used to call myself bisexual, but now I prefer queer”
- “I used to be straight, but now I am lesbian”
- “I am gay, but butch dykes really turn me on”
- “All of the people I fancy are of the other sex, but I wouldn’t call myself straight or heterosexual”
- “I am bi-curious”
- “I think I am heterosexual, but I am very open to changing”
Most sociologists currently believe that one’s sexual orientation – whether homosexual, heterosexual or something else- results from a complex interplay between biological factors and social learning. Some scholars argue that biological influences are the most important, predisposing certain people to become homosexual from birth. biological explanations for homosexuality have included differences in such things as brain characteristics of homosexuals and the impact on fetal development of the mother’s uterus hormone production during pregnancy.
Differences between gay and straight sexual orientation appear at a very early age. In a study, a group of openly homosexual men were asked when they first became aware of their attraction to men and boys, when they realized that they were gay and when they “came out” to others. The group reported becoming aware of their attraction at a very young age, between 5 years old and puberty. Self-awareness of their sexual orientation took place around puberty, and coming out of the closet took place much later.
Finally, there is some evidence that the brains of homosexuals may be different from those of heterosexual men and women. The differences have been found in the hypothalamus, which controls eating, drinking, temperature regulation and sexual behavior. Studies done in the Netherlands and in Southern California have found such differences in several areas within the hypothalamus. One region, the mid sagittal area of the anterior commissure, is larger in females than in males, but also appears to be larger in homosexual males. Another area, the suprachiasmatic nucleus, which controls circadian rhythm, is larger in heterosexual males and females than it is in homosexuals.
But the question whether sexual orientation is inborn or learned still remains in a controversial stage, all that we can say is in the modern contemporary world the notions of gender and sexuality are fast changing, for instance homosexuality is now a more accepted part of everyday society than it used to be before. The modern world has become quite liberal and open, this is evident by the decision of the Delhi High Court which has legalized gay marriages. The fact that, now we can see people freely accepting their sexual orientation in public which 10 years ago would have been considered deviant and would have been looked upon as sin suggests that times are changing and we should all embrace the change.
Even gender roles and traditional beliefs that girls have to be pure and chaste and boys have to be macho and aggressive are fast loosening. The age old gender stereotypes are no longer operating rather a new society which is liberal in accepting different kinds of sexualities is coming up. Gender roles and norms regarding how men and women ought to behave have undergone a paradigm shift. Girls can now be seen in jobs which were earlier deem fit only for boys. All this shows that our society has come far away from the earlier prejudices but there is still a long way to go.
How many times have we heard from couples living away from each other that, “long distance relationships are haaaard”. Many a times we ourselves have passed the judgment saying, “these kind of relationships don’t work”… of course they dont, nothing works on its own ….you are supposed to make it work. We all know that much ….but long distance relationships are not always bad or hard, they do have their share of benefits and funnily enough they might even seem a better option. Here are some things you should definitely appreciate and take advantage of when in such a relationship.
Your space is still your own: Your personal space is like a bubble surrounding you and you are bound to feel uncomfortable if someone is constantly trying to get in. True, your partner has a right to intrude but think again do you want his/her’s permission before taking every decision, you might want his/her’s opinion but not permission. In a long distance relationship, your personal bubble is still intact, you have your own time, you can pursue any opportunity and can freely use all your time for your interests.
Gives you time to think : A long distance relationship forces you to go slow in terms of physical intimacy and gives you time to think before you make major decisions. You have time to dwell on questions as to whether you really are ready for such commitment. Is he the right person? Is she worth the emotional pain and the long wait? Etc.
You can be filthy: This might sound funny but one of the biggest advantages you have is that you can be filthy. You can live without taking a bath for days, you don’t need to change your jeans every other day and you don’t have to go check your appearance every time you go out. In short, you can enjoy being untidy and messy without someone complaining, “Baby, why don’t you just go take a bath”
The joy of meeting: The anticipation, the excitement and finally the joy you feel when you see your sweetheart after such a long time. This feeling would never be known to the couples who live together and this is the very feeling which makes you sure about your choice and strengthens your bond.
Increases the value of a person : Spending time apart from someone shows you how much you really need them in your life.You talk more and kiss and cuddle less. At first, this might sound too bad but it might prove good in the long run. Since you communicate more you get to know the other person really well, you actually fall in love with his/her personality rather than appearance. Being away also increases the other’s value, haven’t we heard thatabsence makes the heart grow fonder.
No choice between friends and love : Majority of couples face this single problem, if your partner and you have different sets of friends the problem gets worsened, you can be trapped in situations when you have to choose among the two. But a long distance couple never faces this problem, when your boyfriend is in town your friends will be extra understanding since they know you rarely get a chance to meet him, while he would also encourage you to hang out more with your friends as it would be helpful to cope with the emotional trauma you feel once he’s gone.
You can indulge freely in some casual flirting without bothering about the other’s jealousy : This is truly the good part , you can sometimes indulge yourself in casual and healthy flirting just for fun without bothering about the other’s jealousy. This doesn’t mean that you have to be unfaithful to your significant other but a little flirting won’t hurt anyone and may even brighten your mood.
Saves money : You can save a lot of petrol and your hard earned pocket money…..but this can go the other way also, if you decide to travel a lot to see your sweetheart or decide to talk or text every other minute.
So next time someone says, “long distance relationships doesn’t work or are very hard”……just remember there are many benefits distance has to offer, grab them and let your love travel the distance. After all, “distance does not ruin people’s relationship, you don’t have to see someone daily to be in love”.
Dating: an event which can even make a very confident person to lose his cool and act like a school kid. What to say, when to speak and when to just shut up and listen, where to go for the date, how to make it exciting and adventurous, how to impress the other, what to wear and many other similar questions haunts you at every hour of the day and by the time the blessed moment arrives you’re totally nervous. Does the situation sound similar? Do all these remind you of your first date?
If yes and you have still got no answer to the million dollar question, “how to make your date a perfect one?”Let me tell you at the start there is no single set of rules which you need to follow to make your date a perfect one. The most important point to be kept in mind is that you should first get to know the other person, what does he/she likes, what is his idea of adventure, what is his idea of a perfect date, for someone it might be a candle light dinner in a posh restaurant but for some other it may be a pub or even an amusement park.
Respect the other’s wish and give it more importance than yours, it makes them feel special and lucky to have got a mate who is willing to sacrifice his preferences just for yours. You should choose a location very carefully, you need to make your date comfortable and the surroundings do play an important role.
Dress for the occasion: wearing shorts and a casual t-shirt for dinner in a restaurant is not a good idea, you might like those cool and comfortable shorts but keep in mind that you’re going out with a lady and should dress as per the occasion. Never make the other person feel embarrassed because of your poor dressing sense.
Always appear with a gift: you don’t need to buy an expensive one, just a bunch of flowers or some chocolates would do, but appearing with a small token of appreciation would surely earn you some brownie points.
Compliments and attention: Chris Rock, the famous comedian once said that any woman needs three things to survive oxygen, food and compliments. Well, this statement does has some truth. So make her feel comfortable and compliment her. Your compliments should never sound fake or too much stretced from the truth. Don’t just pay compliments like, you’re beautiful, tell her why is she so beautiful to you, tell her what do you specifically like about her but don’t overdo it, it may have the opposite effect. Every girl wants to feel special, tell her that she is different, try using adjectives like beautiful rather than hot or sexy.
As compliments are to girls similarly attention is to a guy. Listen to a guy, not just with your ears but with your expressions, your body language and actions. Be sympathetic. Appreciate him for his efforts, say how much you liked it, and he would love it.
Talk a lot: By talking a lot, I don’t mean mindless chatter or you telling your whole life history and the other one listening as if there is no other option. What I mean is be open, frank, don’t talk in monosyllables, try to include the other one. If your date is a bit shy and doesn’t speak much, start speaking and sharing, ask about his opinion so that he is bound to answer. Show interest and never be self absorbed.
Now you know, just put in that little extra and you can easily make your ordinary date an extraordinary one. The key is to make the other feel important and special. Let your special one know that you’re happy and there’s no place on earth you’d rather be than here.
With the internet being as big as the universe, more and more people are browsing through the galaxies of websites that offer online dating services. After all, everybody wants love, and if using technology is naturally happening in the rest of our lives, why not in love? In the recent years online dating has grown in a big way with India having 15 million takers of the online dating service. The busy lifestyle surely is attracting more and more people to find chemistry on the net but don’t you want to be sure that the cute 24-year-old guy is actually cute, is really 24 and most importantly is really a guy. While dating online, it is very important that you protect yourself and this can be easily done by following a few guidelines, trusting your instincts and using common sense. These are some tips that might come handy while you search for the magic online.
Choose a well-reputed site: The first thing that you need to take care of is to choose a site with a good reputation like dateiitians.com. You can check out the site and read its privacy policy and also browse through profiles and see whether they seem real or not. Choosing a good site is very important and considerably lowers the risks. You don’t want to be wooed by a rapist, serial killer or worst enough a married man looking for casual sex. And trust me these things do happen, just consider the widely reported case of Jeffrey Maralis, a serial rapist in Philadelphia who met his victims on Match.com.
Don’t provide personal information too soon: Information like your last name, address or phone number should never be disclosed on your profile. If you have developed a considerable degree of trust on the other person only then you should disclose personal information and then too be over-cautious. There’s no need to be paranoid about your privacy, but at the same time, it is wise to take simple precautions that will ensure you remain safe until you are completely comfortable.
Take it slow: Take your time, don’t be in too much of a rush to meet in person. If you are concerned the person in the photo is not who they say they are, ask them to take a quick digital shot holding that day’s newspaper. Use apps for background checks. You can also Google their user profile name. Many times people are on multiple dating sites and use the same profile name. If you find this is the case, ask the person if they are only on one dating site and see what they say. Look for inconsistencies and questionable characteristics in their communication.
Be ultra safe when meeting for the first time: There might be butterflies flying in our stomach and you may feel as if your heartbeat is beating as loud as a drum but amidst all these don’t forget that your safety should still be your first concern. These are some simple rules you should follow while meeting for the first time:
- Always meet in a populated public place and stay around public places.
- Travel there on your own – don’t accept a lift from your date.
- Do tell a friend or family member who you are meeting, where you are going and when you will be back.
- Stay sober.
- Take your mobile phone.
- Your personal belongings can be stolen. Your drink can be drugged. Don’t leave them unattended.
Trust your gut instinct: Lastly, if you ever feel that something’s wrong don’t disregard it coz you might just be right. Trust your gut instinct, it is the most powerful psychological tool you have at your disposal.
If you take these simple precautions internet can turn to be the most convenient and safest way to meet people. Best thing about it is, you can even flirt with a number of people at one time. Talk about multi-tasking:)keep an open mind, an open heart and most of all, your common sense with you and online dating can help you get your valentine.
In the matter of love, we Indians are taught from childhood that our parents would find a mate for us when the right time and age comes. Most of us have accepted this and don’t usually dare to go outside the accepted norms of society. While the scenario is slowly changing and we can see couples walking hand-in-hand in movie theatres and malls, online dating portals still remain a taboo. We are not afraid to chat on facebook with strangers but are afraid to join a dating website, we are not afraid to go on a date with a guy after meeting him only once but are afraid to go on a virtual date with a like-minded guy with whom we have been chatting for days. We are obsessed with the digital world and consider it as vital as oxygen but we still pull ourselves back when it comes to finding love online. Isn’t it hypocritical of us?
Why do we the “so called” well-educated and open-minded people consider dating online a taboo? In search for the answer, a survey was conducted and the opinion of the college going youngsters was sought. You might be shocked to hear their responses:
A guy has to say this, “Dating online is like paying for sex, you are filled with a sense of shame that you can’t find a person yourself and you need to pay for it.”
Another girl has to say, “I would never go for online dating, it’s cheap and it shows desperation.”
A guy from a premier law college says I would rather like to date a real person whom I can touch and see and smell rather than a faceless girl or who knows even a boy on net.”
This is the public response but the statistics tell a different story. According to the BBC World Service global opinion poll 2010, 59 per cent of Internet users in India consider that internet is a good place to look for a match.
After these types of responses, it seemed that people are totally against online dating. But on probing some more many of them accepted that they were willing to give it a try but the twist in the tale was they were not ready to accept it in public due to the shame they feel.
First of all, just a gentle reminder to all those who think that online dating is cheap; love doesn’t require a place to blossom. It just needs two sincere hearts. The choice is all yours, whether you want to wait for years hoping that your prince charming would someday ring your doorbell and say, “hey princess, I’m the one you’re looking for” or wouldn’t you rather go out and try finding your Mr. /Ms. Perfect.
Secondly, there is a mistaken belief among people that sites that are free are less reliable, well this is totally untrue, for instance dateiitians.com is an online dating portal which is totally secure. It has an elaborate registration process which requires you to give your id-proof and other documents and only then it allows access to the site and what’s more it’s even free. So, you can be sure about its authenticity and reliability.
Next, we Indians need to embrace the change. While many things can go wrong on an online date so can a real date turn out to be a disaster. What are we afraid of, we might not be chatting to a person depicted from the photos, well in reality also people are hardly what they seem, moreover in an online dating you are bound to communicate more and thus understand each other better.
While western countries are whole heartedly embracing the change why are we lying behind in our web of insecurities, doubt and fear. Trust me, whatever has to go wrong can go wrong on a real date as well. If you’re still not sure, just go watch the Hollywood movies, Must love dogs and you’ve got mail which are centered around the concept of online dating and you might be tempted to go in search for your dream girl on the net. But beware make an intelligent choice; go to a site which you trust. You can check out dateiitians.com for sure if you’re willing to give online dating a try.
Earlier people use to travel round the world in search of love, but you are lucky, your love might be just a click away; you don’t need to go to different countries, just go “online”.
“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.”
― Robert A Heinlein
Who in this world doesn’t want to love ? Doesn’t want to find a life partner who will stay by his side through thick and thin, who doesn’t want a fairytale romance ? Many of you while reading these lines might be lost in the thoughts of your special someone. Lucky guys ! But many wouldn’t have ever experienced the flying butteflies a lover experiences.Yes life today is very busy, fast paced and many don’t even have time for their own selves. In such scenariois finding a person to date has become exceedingly cumbersome for many. In such cases online dating sites come to the rescue of many.
Online dating services generally require a prospective member to provide personal information, before they can search the service provider’s database for other individuals using criteria they set, such as age range, gender and location. Online dating sites use market metaphor to properly match people up.[1] Most sites allow members to upload photos of themselves and browse the photos of others. Sites may offer additional services, such as webcasts, online chat, telephone chat (VOIP), and message boards. Some sites provide free registration, but may offer services which require a monthly fee.
But is India ready for such a major change ? In a country in which prospective partners are usually found by parents , are these online dating sites a welcome change ? People resort to such sites either for casual fun ,testing the waters or perhaps looking for the love of their life. Many people claim to have met their soulmates on such sites but on the flipside many others also usually find creeps ! When this method of dating was originally started, there was an air of desperation around it. People used to associate it with those who could not find a relationship in “real life “. Though much of this perception still remains , the number of people to use these sites has without a doubt increased. But all this not without the numerous questions and doubts it poses.
Some points put forward by those who advocate this method of finding love as something that might become atleast not frowned upon of not conventional
- You can find the person that you have dreamed about, since you can find out everything about them before you even decide to approach them.
- Location is not an issue anymore.
- You can get to know someone without the commitment of actually getting together.
- You can get to chose people with whom you would like to meet by checking their interests and profiles
- The awkwardness of the first date is eliminated because you have already interacted
But as the other side of the coin always exists , we also have certain issues raised by people who believe that online dating is just a short term solution which can never help you find true love .
- Premature frankness- when you meet a person online who seems who have a similar viewpoint on things as you do and the moment the interaction starts,you believe that you both clicked ! this leads you to be very open and frank very early in a relationship . You might have experienced that it is very easy to text a person stuff which would have required a lot of nerves on your part to say face to face. Such premature acquaintance increases your vulnerability especially considering that the person you are chatting with might turn out to be a fraud !
- Lies-white or malicious,lies are definitely not a base you would want your relationship to be based on.You never know whom you are talking to, what age they are , or what gender they are . What they portray in their profile might not be the actual them. Just because what you wrote in your profile was all truth, it doesn’t(and why should it ) guarantee that the person you are talking to is also speaking the truth and not inventing stuff from the figment of his/her imagination! And by the time you realize the actuality, it might be too late ! so be careful and think before you start imagining someone as your prince charming or princess of dreams .
- Are they bragging? – well even if a person is trying to be honest on a site , it isn’t necessary that what they are telling you isn’t just their own perception of themselves rather then what he/she actually appears to people. And there is nothing you can do to guard against that . The profile might describe a girl as “vivacious, independent, open-minded” but might end up as an air-headed brat when you first meet her. People create multiple online personas as a means to satisfy their urge to be someone they always wanted to be.
- Dishonesty ! – It is very easy to conceal one’s marital status online and when you find out the truth ,you have been cheated through and through .Many married men thinking that they are having just harmless fun resort to such sites and results have proved to be disastrous for many a damsel .
- Undermining relationships with friends and family- In any offline relationship, friends and family play a very important role as a support and guidance source. And help one know about the direction a relationship is heading and if its working out or not. On any online relationship ,you are the person sole responsible for your actions.
Whether all these problems quoted above strike a chord with your or not, there is no denying the fact that online relationships are to be undertaken with all care and realizing that all that one might see , might not be the truth. But isn’t the current generation so addicted to experimenting ? :p So go ahead , meet people but with all due care and precaution!
